nightmare on egg street

August 28, 2010
By
BrokenEgg

I had a nightmare the other night. I was making fried eggs, over medium. The slightly runny kind that leave a little yolk sauce behind, perfect for soaking up with buttered bread. In my dream I was eating the delicious eggs, enjoying them. All of the sudden, I became deathly ill. In the dream it wasn’t just me that became ill, hundreds of people everywhere where falling ill from runny eggs! Which brought to mind a favorite movie of mine, Like Water for Chocolate/ Como Agua Para Chocolate. The protagonist, Tita, has a profound connection with food. So deep that when she cries tears of sorrow for her one true-love, into her sister wedding cake, it has quite an effect on the wedding guests who enjoy it. I know it’s six minutes long and in Español but trust me, it’s a nightmare worth watching. I am begining to think that this romantic disorder could be real and not just a fictional, dramatic story.  If sorrow and terror  travel through this woman and her food, could they in fact  travel through hens and their eggs to make us sick?  Maybe it’s not salmonella infecting the eggs after all…. Who knows? Until we find out, stick

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the k team presents\/\/kreepy

August 28, 2010
By
the k team presents\/\/kreepy

Do you sleep with the light on? Maybe it’s time to take a page from ancient Japanese cultures by invoking Baku, the Eater of Dreams. This creature can transform the most terrifying nightmares–of natural disasters, falling, or being chased by a maniaK–into good fortune by special request. Just recite the following phrase before bed: ‘Devour, Oh Baku! Devour my evil dream!’ Or you can just turn that light off and let the K Team lead you bacK into the darK with this dreamy song. Photo by Kathryn O’Shields-Blackman 2010

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un-nightmare

August 26, 2010
By
Bundesbahn, Bahnhof Straubing

after all this talking about nightmares how can we go to sleep? well I have a tested cure (tested on animals and vegetables) this un-nightmare can be taken before or after a nighmare (don’t think about what you have under the bed)

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political scientism | we all scream for flat screen

August 26, 2010
By
political scientism | we all scream for flat screen

If I wrote a political column worth its salt, I’d use this week’s theme — nightmares — to talk about the upcoming electoral season. After all, the word night-mares could be tweaked to mean “dark horses,” and I’d use that play on words as a jumping off point for a post about the candidates who might do surprisingly well at the polls. If that interests you, may I suggest fivethirtyeight.com? But on to the column that I wrote … Someone who I presume is much smarter than I am wrote that “the purpose of government from an economic perspective is to provide a legal framework that allows individuals to transact through markets.” Being the narcissist that I am, I interpret that to mean that “the purpose of government is to encourage me to buy a flat-screen high-definition television set.” And, in that sense, my recent foray into consumer culture was a– shit, what do you call it? It’s the opposite of a double-rainbow … That’s right, a double-nightmare. Let’s make short work of the first part of the nightmare, shall we? That is, having a television in the first place, which is upsetting in its own right. I hate having to

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how to succeed in crazy without really trying

August 26, 2010
By
how to succeed in crazy without really trying

I was going to write on Waking Life, to counterbalance Tyler’s review of Inception, but Inception is fun and Waking Life is not and I just couldn’t sit through it again. Elitist Professor recommended it to me years ago; I sat through it with diligence and focus and boredom and nausea. I formed a resolution in my heart never to learn the how-to’s of lucid dreaming. Then, that night, I dreamt that I woke up and went to the bathroom three times before I actually woke up and went to the bathroom. Or did I? Yeah, I’m pretty sure I did. I heart reality. I’m an accountant that way: ever since I was a kid, I’ve liked having one interpretation of the world. It doesn’t hold up, of course, especially after courses in literary theory, but I’m such a square that I’ve been remarkably good at ignoring all I’ve read. Jacob’s Ladder is even worse than my most horrible nightmares. Pollock is about on a level with them. Because I feel very strongly about rock-solid reality, I approve of representational art and am much less fond of modern art. The vagueness bothers me. “Well, this can be titled ‘Ode to

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a portrait of the artist right before he ate your face

August 24, 2010
By
198486015_2b2eb4935c_o

Not only is a print of this image NOT for sale, but one will be forced upon you against your wishes, unless you run away right now.

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this week on the avant guardian\/\/nightmares!

August 23, 2010
By
this week on the avant guardian\/\/nightmares!

This is from a sketchbook about a nightmare. The water didn’t stop forever and I couldn’t take a bath.

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the k team presents\/\/kitkatsu

August 22, 2010
By
the k team presents\/\/kitkatsu

Hiccup...hicKup! Anyone here get the hiKKups with test-taking?

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fizzy water, coke, and soft shell crabs

August 21, 2010
By
fizzy water, coke, and soft shell crabs

Coca-cola-hiccups- bridge-of-sighs. Spaghetti-Coca-cola-gondola….perfect recipe for hiccups. I have a long-standing animosity for the hiccups and I am pretty sure I am not alone on this. There are some of us in this world who are diaphragm-challenged. The little spasms come and can last an hour, a day, or maybe even continue on and off for 5 or 6 days. Do you have any idea how terrible that feels? And nothing works, I’ve tried it all. Not even I have a successful recipe. This past week I have been very lucky to be traveling abroad. I have also been terribly saddened by learning that there is a widespread conspiracy against the Venetians. In Venice there is work being done around the ‘Bridge of Sighs’ and the ‘Doge Palace.’ As the sign says, the City of Venice cannot pay for the repairs so they have acquired a sponsor to help float the costs. In order for the sponsor to reap a fair amount of business, they have a permit to make the world’s biggest scrim and cover the scaffolding around the corner of the Palace and on the ends of the famous bridge. So they’ll be showing up in tourist slideshows all

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the k team special request\/\/rock the vote

August 20, 2010
By
the k team special request\/\/rock the vote

The K Team is maKing a video, you guys! But first we need a little help picKing a song.

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