music

tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow

May 21, 2010
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tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow

Time, time, time. The Cloudy Messenger. That which escapes all of us. Flash indeed. Most people no longer use a watch so the piece of music above, Leroy Anderson’s The Syncopated Clock (1944), sounds like a lulling relic of a playful time where brass was oiled, and tea came with DELICIOUS cookies. Push play. I could check my watch all day to that ish! Pops gave me a pocket watch for my birthday this year. A huge antique train conductor’s watch. It’s like having a metal ice cream sandwich in your pocket. Like the ones from camp that came six to a plastic clamshell. Good god I want one, it’s so hot outside. And there’s a huge chain on this watch that gives it the authority of a mace. Watch is legit. Not built for skinny jeans. It’s for those who REALLY need to know what time it is. I could have used that watch this past weekend when every mode of communication went to hell in one glossy-sleek-personal-hand-held-computing-basket. My friend Officer Mike, in an act of complete and utter lunacy, decided to run a 50 mile ultra marathon from mile marker 51 to mile marker 1 in the Florida Keys. It

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this week on the avant guardian \/\/ rainbow warriors

April 5, 2010
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this week on the avant guardian \/\/ rainbow warriors

“Burning embers hearts united We remembered mystical beauty If you look hard you can find a Rainbow trail it’s deep inside ya Fear not you’re a rainbowarrior” -cocorosie

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the laziest 2010 winter music conference wrap up ever\/\/jesus, there are scumbags everywhere

April 2, 2010
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the laziest 2010 winter music conference wrap up ever\/\/jesus, there are scumbags everywhere

Winter Music Conference is a trying moment for the city of Miami because seventy five percent of the tourists in town are tripping balls and totally need some water or something bro. I set out over the last several days to actively avoid this crap. Here are my thoughts and ruminations: These people are weird and drastically void of self awareness. Each set list on the ubiquitous club poster has so many names that it’s confusing to wade through. I am not on the cutting edge of nightclub electronica, but I don’t know ANY of these people. Everyone walking around town seems British. I write a music column on the internet and don’t give a smegma. The thing about Winter Music Conference is that it’s all about club drugs. Learned about “mali” this week. Apparently it’s a really intense form of ecstasy and dangerous for people who are prone to lockjaw. Like jaundice. Anyway Mali is no longer JUST a country in western Africa. Ohh there ARE a lot of British people here. Boom chicka boom chicka doo doo doo DOO DOO DOO DOODOODOODOODOODOODOODOODOO PEEEEEEEWSCHHHHHHH!!!! Fake DJ names: DJ Vaguely Japanese. DJ Wet Matches. DJ Flog. DJ Purple Drank. DJ Bond James

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this week on the avant guardian \/\/ tighten up

March 8, 2010
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this week on the avant guardian \/\/ tighten up

Archie Bell and the Drells’ 1968 hit “Tighten Up” is one of a long line of American popular songs built around a dance. There are few lyrics beyond Bell’s cajoling the band and the dancers (you!).  He does claim at the beginning of the song that “we dance just about as good as we walk,” which is a pretty transporting possibility when you think about it. Apparently, Bell fought in Vietnam while the song was climbing the charts, and could only come back to tour with the band after having been shot in the leg. That’s some rich irony to live, and sing. In these “tough economic times,” we need his simple, easy-to-follow advice… and all the better if it comes with some heavy Texas soul music… Bon appetite…

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the set up

February 12, 2010
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the set up

What you got? You think this is a hustle? I’m pretty sure you don’t know me or the Don Kix I rode in on. That shit talkin’ is straight bullshit. Fresh Kid Icing around the block. Oi. Please. (QUICK ASIDE: The Pharcyde’s “Ya Mama”. Possibly the best diss track of all time.) Personally, I prefer constant contradiction. What’s that? No that’s that. You’re right, but you’re wrong. I hate America and love America. I’m sure you can relate but I’d rather you didn’t. WHO DAT? Who dat say dey gonna beat dem Saints? WHO DAT? Who dat say dey gonna beat dem Saints? FYI I found out the other day that the bald eagle is a frat boy. It’s gonna be really sad when it goes extinct. Inevitable. “We regret to inform you tonight that last remaining member of the species Haliaeetus leucocephalus more commonly known as the ‘Bald Eagle’ died. Our thoughts and our prayers and the stern face that I’m making right now go out to each American family out there. These are troubling times. God Bless us all.” Sometimes shittalking comes in the form of advice. I had someone say, just the other day, hey, why don’t

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dogface boy \/\/ ……in case you were wondering.

November 20, 2009
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dogface boy \/\/ ……in case you were wondering.

.. . Antony Hegardy o Is the reason ghosts love the rain. “The Lake” Edgar Allen Poe Reinterpreted by Antony Hegardy In youth’s spring, it was my lot To haunt of the wide earth a spot To which I could not love the less So lovely was the loneliness Of a wild lake, with black rock bound And the tall trees that towered around But when the night had thrown her pall Upon that spot as upon all And the wind would pass me by In it’s stilly melody My infant spirit would awake To the terror of the lone lake My infant spirit would awake To the terror of the lone lake Yet that terror was not fright But a tremulous delight And a feeling undefined Springing from a darkened mind Death was in that poisoned wave And in it’s gulf a fitting grave For him who thence could solace bring To his dark imagining Whose wildering though could even make An Eden of that dim lake But when the night had thrown her pall Upon that spot as upon all And the wind would pass me by In it’s stilly melody My infant spirit would awake To the

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air / space

November 17, 2009
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air / space

Humans always want to reach other realms. With the birth of electronic music and its wholehearted acceptance into 80′s popular culture, humans got closer to otherworldliness.  Androgyny reigned and as people summoned their Martian counterparts by way of instruments altering natural sound, they all grew a little closer to the weird and strange, dead, undead, broken, distant, and freakish. With synth pop’s uneasy swells and nuances.  Ghosts and the paranormal seem closer than before. Science fiction and narrative become more a part of the look and feel of 80′s music. Waving mind-numbing sounds with electro-light shows, fog, and indiglo face paint took center stage eating up any bit a reminder of the normalcy in the streets outside.  ••• Gary Numan, a  progenitor of the pop electronic music movement summons alien chic, otherworldliness and captivating escapism with flailing arms and limbs. Electronics have brought us closer to the unknown, just like acid, yet more creepy and straight edge.

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cut the fruit from the vine, and the whole world falls away

November 3, 2009
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cut the fruit from the vine, and the whole world falls away

I used to have a definite deathwish. During my twenties, I decided that I would kill myself when I turned 33. I wasn't depressed, I simply didn't want to grow old. “Decrepitude” has such a nasty ring to it—did then, still does—and an even nastier smell. And now, almost four years past that expiration date, I can report that I was being stupid. But then I go and write stuff like the following...

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