Ecstasy. Power. Codified. Holisitc. Deliverance. History. Anger. Threshold. Hegemony. Energy. Paradox.
WORDS, Words, words.
When I think about codes in the performance of everyday life, words always seem to come to mind. Semantics, in almost every culture, signify who we are, what we are doing, and how we react to our world and relationships. Words carry a heavy weight, and our particular choice of language is deeply linked to the identity we forge for ourselves everyday.
My fascination with the performative power of words began when I dated a linguist. He was/is very intelligent, but like many in his field, had no faith that humans could change their semantic destiny. In his eyes we were just lame ducks, and no matter what we did, a larger and more epic movement would have to alter the way we speak. Our everyday use of language was more or less incidental.
He did not believe that choosing to say “you all” versus “you guys” to encourage gender neutral language was necessary, or even helpful. In his eyes (and in the eyes of many with certain levels of intellectual/gender privilege) how hegemony attacks us through language is not important, but to be expected as the status quo. Rather than taking the word “bitch” out of his vocabulary because of how it made me feel, or how it perpetuates a certain hate and degradation of women, he saw it as just another word, one that could not be stopped by just him.
At the time, being a fearful child, I just bat my eyelashes and agreed with him. “Sure. I mean, yeah.” I can still hear myself spitting those non-incidental, very weak words back at him. Needless to say, I now wholeheartedly disagree with him on all fronts.
I see language as an integral part of our personal performance, ones that we change everyday in order to survive. Shifts in language DO reflect greater movements, ones that occur within individuals and ripple out. Language, like our identities cannot and will not remain static.
Not only can words effect what we do, but how our physical and spiritual balance as well. Just look at the ways in which we describe emotion and self in the English language. Unlike in French, Spanish, or Greek, when we feel an emotion, we ARE that emotion. “I am angry” versus “I have anger” or ” I am with anger.” The way the words bind us to our feelings can often be cripple and overwhelm us psychologically.
Renowned philosopher, Judith Butler (known to some as “Giant Brain”), talks about language as a force of power that works over us whether we like it or not. Even before we are born, our names (not chosen by us) can hugely influence how we can/will conduct ourselves in life. Again, look at the phrasing, “I am Kwilks” versus “My name is” or “I am called”. Moreover, these words retain so much strength because they are enigmatic and operate in ways that often remain unseen or unnoticed.
If words have hidden super powers, breed injustice, and destroy or uplift us spiritually, then we need to be hyper aware of them, yeah? Unless we make a purposeful effort to watch what we say, language, as my dear sweet ex said, will run the show and we will be helpless against it. So, and as simple as it may be…choose your words wisely.
And now, a PSA from our dear friends Cameo:
Image credit: Another Transmission for the Reconnections
You should have asked Mr. Linguist whether or not he thought there was a difference between “that guy I’m seeing” and “my boyfriend.”